Fatih..my cultural informant as DU study abroad packet would call him...got in an arguement with me today...it is apparent that people have pride in their nations no matter how wrong or right they think their own government is. Fatih and i both have a habit of being too defensive...when he mentions the Iraq war the hairs on the back of my neck practically stand on end and i prepare to do battle. When i mention the slaves of the Ottman empire he barely lets me finish before he counter attacks.
We both have to step outside of ourselves in order to have a meaningful conversation because we have come to the point where arguing with each other doesn't get us anywhere at all. I can scream and yell at him and defend Americas honor but at the end of the day his mind is made up, rightly or wrongly, fairly or unfairly he has his opinions about my nation. The same goes for my thoughts on his beloved Turkey...we are both ready to defend our nation with words.
The important thing i am learning is to acknowledge. When i nod in acceptance or carefully consider his words before passing judgement, we actually make head way. When i listen to his arguements on why he is against the Iraq war i can understand and even appreciate his point of view. i can even assure him that many Americans would agree with many of his points.
At the end of the day though, when we are sitting on the terrace while he smokes a Camel cigarette while i sip on my tea, everything we disagree about matters very little. We have on fundamental agreement, that comes from our religions Christianity and Islam: love.
Rumi thought that friends lives affect each other...when a frog ties itself to a mouse and the mousealso gets picked up by a crow...the frog goes with it. it doesn't matter what the frog believes or what he does...that is the "force of friendship"
and now my dear readers i am sure that if i have not affectively bored you to death i have confused you to tears so i will reluctantly leave off my philosophizing... which would gravely disappoint Descartes with its spastic nature...and leave you with a final thought...
could it be that what fundamentally divides us (religion, ideas, social class) has the ability to fundamentally unite us? After all if we are all so dedicated and loyal to our ideals and morals...then we share at least one thing...our dedication and loyalty...and isnt' that what matters anyway...the bread is the important part...not the kind of jam you put on it!
ciao!
jessi
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