Best Friend/Worst Enemy

I can't believe how much i learned about my own culture just by being here...

there is a great admiration for Malcom X i've discovered from international students...one of my German friends was so excited when she saw me reading his autobiography that she promptly began to tell me why and how she admired him, not to mention many of my Kurdish friends consider him to be a great leader...and not even that some of my Turkish friend expressed their admiration as well....

I hope it is my own fault and not the failing of the educational system in America that has led me to know very little about Black American leaders and important figures in America.

mostly i rememeber every February we get a lecture or two about the Civil Rights movement and Martin Luther King Jr.

Not that he wasn't a great man....but how much are we missing out on....I've learned about Bendict Arnold who is notorious for betraying the Patriots to the British in the American Revolution

but i've never even heard Jesse Jackson's name, or Angela Davis' name mentioned in my history education in school

Is that because it isn't important that we learn about the blacks who spoke the loudest with messages we dont like to hear or rememeberor attempted to thwart the system at every turn...who didn't preach the message of turn the other cheek? Do they think that if we learn about them...then we may try to imitate them? Really do they think we are that simple?

I've learned more about Black American leaders here in Turkey where they are widely admired and accepted...then i ever did at home...

On another note...I had a goal before i came to Turkey...its a life goal....of befriending someone i dont like.

I've accomplished that goal here, and learned so much from it.

This person brings out the very worst in me, and even a short conversation is devastatingly painful to me...but nevertheless i stick to my guns and i gut it out.

I've spent a fair amount of time learning about this person and trying to understand them better and appreciate their finer points....

but mostly i've learned that when you force yourself to see the good in people you dont like...it makes you so much more humble and understanding and compassionate as well.

I am now so very aware of my actions towards others and i try at all times to be kind and relaxed and easy going because this person has made me realize how easy it is to start a war...

If you dont try to understand someone or see their perspective simply because you dont like them...then yah...fighting them is an easy way out

If i was not this persons friend i could very well be their worst enemy and sometimes i wish i were just so i could actually say the scathing words that come to mind when this certain person utters the stupid ridiculous crap that they seem to deem important.


But i'm in this for the long haul because i can feel how good it is for me...first it allows me to just be myself, because this person doesn't care what i say or what i do in any way. but second it causes me to be more cautious and humble in my daily interactions with others because i want to be the kind of person who doesn't rub everyone the wrong way and cause waves and problems every where i go


...and thirdly it forces me to suppress my initial instincts to attack or quickly defend myself and in doing so...i'm a more peaceful person..

I challenge all of you...who are brave enough to keep reading my blog...Befriend someone you dont like...i mean someone who grates your nerves...someone who's voice is like nails ona chalkboard to you....someone that says the things you cant stand to hear.

Befriend this person...and then...watch yourself grow!

ciao!
jessi